Why After Why

I’m obsessed with understanding why. Why do I feel the way I feel, why do I react the way I react? My obsessive search for answers never leads to resolutions. It’s only when I let go and stop looking that I begin to understand things. I stop searching and start seeing.

I was never pleased with any of my answers. I needed something fascinating. So even when I started to acknowledge that certain ways of thinking or being weren’t beneficial, I continued to search for more. I needed substantial evidence. Only recently have I grasped the fact that incessantly searching for the “why” was the source of my continued frustration. If I left my feelings alone, they had nothing left to carry them, so away they passed.

You don’t have to obsess over your problems. You don’t have to understand them. You don’t have to know where they come from. As long as you see them, insight will arise. We get caught in attempting to understand why we feel the way we feel. Then we see that we are upset and instead of giving the emotion the attention it needs, we continue on our search for answers on why certain situations make us feel certain ways. We continue asking why, after why, after why.

When a negative feeling arises, sit with it. Give it time and space. Allow it to sink in. You’ll come to the realization that certain reactions are no longer serving you. The realizations arise on their own through continued awareness. As you stay aware, your attachment to the instances that trigger you will slowly dissolve. Have patience and know that with time, heartfelt attention and an open mind, your negative reactions will become less and less.  You’ll begin to welcome all experience with open arms. As things occur, with a smile you’ll think to yourself “this too, this too” 🙂

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